There’s so much to say lately and not enough words with which to say it.

I am working on a fundraising page for 4 Paws for Ability in J’s honor, so that we can meet our fundraising requirement to see him to getting his dog. I keep worrying that I may be portraying myself as someone who sees this dog as a magic band-aid for the struggles we go through daily. He or she simply won’t be. They’ll be another ally to help me make his life easier and better. They’re an ally who will bring a lot of work with them, to be sure, but all of the work that will be required to make their life good is work that would make all of our lives good.

That’s something I can commit to, along with soggy paws and fighting chewing. 

J has a trip to the zoo tomorrow, weather permitting, then a speech evaluation for the schools on Wednesday followed immediately by an ABA session then a sleep study that night.

We’re not jam packing things in or anything, right?

And amidst all this I have to admit, I am flat out beat down and drained feeling. Last week took a strange toll on a lot of people in this area, not the least of which seems to be the fact that it feels like I lost a week and imagine others do too. I cannot remember when I made phone calls, etc. I have to get back on the ball and hope that his OT/Speech clinic hasn’t labelled me Public Enemy 1 for all the messed up-ness that seem inherant to dealing with J and I. 

Here’s hoping that Wednesday goes well.

And that I can write better entries soon.

And finish that page.

And have a nice cold drink on a warm beach somewhere.

I can dream, right?